Ugh I relapsed into eating all over again I've gained a shit load. My stomach hurts so much cause of all the food. It feels stretched to it's limits and it's kiliin me the pain!! I hate this and all this pain. I hate the christmas time ! I"ma start my new fast tomorrow ! NO EATING for as long as I can go ! So my mom was bein such a complete bitch I decdie to spend my fuckin christmas break with her and she acts like nothing but a bitch I mean seriously it's a long ways from my friends and she treats me like shit !wow talk about fucked up maybe next year I just won't come down here next year!
So last night I had an amazing convo with this guy I really like ( me and Josh my fiance aren't doin so well ) well he told me he loved me and told me all these sweet things he's like " I'm not good and telling my emotions and all that stuff" he was like why do you love me Kayley I said " because i like you and stuff" lol I
was makin fun of him ! when I said I doubt you love me he said Kayley I love you he never says my name unless he's serious about what he's sayin! He made my night. But what sucks is I live in Kansas he lives in Indiana ugh But I think this summer we're gonna meet half way some where and I'm so excited to see him ! He truely makes me smile !
Well I have to go to the doctors tomorrow. I have to get my thyroid looked at which means thier gonna draw blood OMG I'ma freak out and cry ! ugh flash backs from last wednesday getting my IV for my wisdom teeth. Well If I have a problem there gonna have me put on medication which will make me loose alot of weight and now my hair will grow back it was falling out ! and I have to get my Birth control shot which I'm not even trippin over ! Oh tomorrow os gonna be crazy !
Saturday I'm finnaly going back home to my dads I'm so excited I miss my daddy I haven't seen him sense ;ast wednesday ! I miss him ! I"m tired of bein at my moms ! Oh and I finally got my new vehicle Which I'm so excited to get YAY !!! So I think when I get back home after my dad leaves again on his work trip i'ma get my eye brow pierced !!! I think it'll look good on me ! Yes? well I think so !!!
Damn My heart pouding right now I took my last two hydrocodon and I"m feelin pretty good ! I smoked a lil green today had a lil vodka with juice and a diet pepsi ! and a fruit snack pack yummy !
Recent as of now knews when I get home I"ma go see my babe I'm so excited I'ma spend my whole 5 days of vacation I have left with him YAY I haven't met him before so it'll be the first time and he tells me I'm gorgeous all the time which I love and he doesn't care about my weight he likes me for me. I said to him I realy hope you like me when you see me he said he doesn't care about my body he loves me for me and it doesn't change anything God he means the world to me and I hope I never loose him. He's gone through so much with me and I can't loose him he understands everything I say and what I"m going through !
Anyways I'ma get off here dang my longest post lol anyways LOVE Kayley ♥
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